Recently someone tried to take me to task for having the audacity to laugh at their lame attempts at apology. This person reminded me that I had once issued my own apology. This is true. Actually, I’ve done it more than once, but let’s just focus on this one time, shall we?
The post to which this person was referring is here. In a fit of ire I posted about the use of the word “nigger” and how some people may or may not perceive it as “not that big of a deal”. As it was, the post that inspired this particular rant was written by the person who made a valiant effort to publicly shame me. Should you visit that post you’ll see that it was updated to apologize to this individual for inferring that he was racist and for offending him. It was in no way an apology for writing the post. I didn’t retract said post. I apologized for an offense. And, amazingly, I have yet to repeat that offense.
I’d also like to add that I do not feel any amount of shame for adding that PUBLIC apology to that post. Why should I? I like to think that I , even though I’m a stupid fuckwit whining bitch, can readily admit I’m wrong and take action to remedy the situation. Sometimes, late at night when no one’s watching, I like to pretend that I’m a mature adult who can recognize an egregious error and admit to it. And, most shockingly, not have to issue a second, third, or fourth apology for the same offense because I don’t make a habit of repeating said error. Are you following me so far?
I probably shouldn’t even respond to this crap, but I felt that the facts were getting skewed. This person has quite an active imagination (I’m putting that kindly) and seems to think I should feel bad for a really good post. I don’t. Sorry. I’m not embarrassed or ashamed or going to curl up and cry. This post emphasizes my feelings on hate speech, though it really focuses on one kind, and I don’t care who sees it. So, I offer him a chance to try to put me in my place again. Please. I can’t wait.
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I’ve apologized for stuff too. Some were public apologies, some private. Big deal. That doesn’t mean you can’t judge the quality of other people’s apologies, especially if they immediately engage in the same behavior for which they’ve just apologized!
Some people in general seem to be under the misapprehension that being “anti-PC” means you get to say whatever nasty, vile thing pops into your head at any moment. No, that’s just being RUDE. And before anyone starts, yeah, I’ve been rude too. But I have the stones to admit that is what it is and not dress it up as something else. In fact, the irony here is that “not PC” started out to mean not using euphemisms for things (such as “vertically challenged” for short, etc.), and now some folks are using “anti-PC” to mean “rude.” Bwah!
I went back and read the original post. It was brilliant. It made me hot just reading it, and I’m just an average white guy with an average white life. Bigotry in all forms just really pisses me off. The treatment of your daughter in that post just amazes me.
You apology seemed appropriate as well. You had nothing to apologize for in the content of the post. Everything you said was 100% true.
I have no problem apologizing.. nor do I have a problem demanding one… or telling people their appologies suck.
Once my SIL ( who i no longer speak to) apologized like this…
“Uh, Yea, I’m sorry things happened they way they did. Next time I think we should just keep our attitudes in check.”
I told her to f off…
Sometimes you have to put your hands up and say sorry, we all mess up at some point and take things the wrong way which can lead to misunderstandings.
The attitude i take is that i said sorry, up to you if you accept it.
A-Men! Sing it, sister.
Vince,
Thank you. I appreciate that. I felt the post could stand on it’s own. But I didn’t want anyone to feel as if I was calling them out at the time. Things have changed apparently.
Raejane,
There is certainly a good way of apologizing and a bad way. Millie is very bad at apologizing. She always makes it about her poor hurt feelings, even when it was she who did wrong.
Lucy,
Absolutely. Take it or leave it. If there is an easy way to clear up a misunderstanding then that road needs to be taken. I tried to do my best at the time and somehow I’m supposed to feel bad about it. Nope. Sure don’t.
Considering the context of the post on which the comment was posted I think he made my point for me.
Why am I not surprised that this is some shit brought up from four-plus months ago? Oyvez!