I hate working in groups. Groups suck ass. Unless it’s a group filled with the most bestest people in the whole of the Intertoobs- but they’re too busy being cool to be in a group. So, I’m stuck. In a group. That I hate.
One of my classes this semester is called “Workgroup Productivity”. It’s a required course, or I would so not have taken it. Anyway, we’re supposed to be learning the be productive members of a group. Duh! And since the course in online, we’re grouped with members from all over the state1 and we’ve never met each other. Probably will never meet each other. Anyway, we’re supposed to start a “business” and create a website for said business. Together. As a team. Duh.
So, the prof set each team up with their own forum to keep in contact. We’re supposed to use that for all discussion. Then she posts our assignments. The first assignment is to simply pick a team leader for this assignment, decide what kind of company we’re going to have, make a logo and slogan, and send her a report. Good enough. One dude and me were discussing some options when another dude pops in and says “We’re going to do an online record label and we’re going to call it this. Oh, and I’m the team leader.” WTF?
Unfortunately I’m not beside him so am unable to slap him in the back of the head. Little bastard. I’m sure he completely missed the part where he only gets to be the “leader” (which means squat in this context) for this project. And that we have to rotate. I bet he’s going to cry when he realizes it.
The other guy, by the way, has two websites he’s already developed. One of them has auto-play music and really bad graphics. The other just looks like blog theme without the blogging stuff. I looked at his source code and it was a mess. I wanted to say “Hey, little dweebs, I’ve got my own site too. Check it out!” and then laugh while their eyeballs popped out of their heads. But then my cover would be blown, so I refrained. I’ll have to keep an eye on these “coders” though to make sure they don’t fucker everything up. If it comes right down to it I might drive to their campuses and smack them in their heads anyway.
Anyway, I can see our site now. A fucking black background with white text and auto-play music. I’m ashamed already.
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9 Comments
Oh, the pain of working with others, especially when they think they’re right. Don’t they know that WE are right, and they are we are merely entertaining ourselves with their “help’?
I hope you make it through the class without killing them.
Such is the curse of working with others. I feel the same way most times when I’m doing group projects.
I only like working in groups full of attractive ladies. You wanna be in my group? Our charter will be to develop a website that reaches through the screen and smack stupid people. We’ll make a killing.
LOL @ Sydwynd!
I also hate groups. Mostly what happens is this: we sit around going la la, who has an idea, not me, I dunno, what do you think, let’s read the directions again, la la, talk about some irrelevant shit, anyone have an idea, la la . . .
And then I go, fuck it, how about this? And not only this, but that and that and that, and this is what we’ll say, and this is how we’ll accomplish it, and bla de bla bla bla. And they all go, wow, maybe you should be in charge? And I end up doing 95% of the work, and it ends up pretty good.
Happens every goddamn time.
LOL @ Sydwynd too!
Groups bite.
We also could develop a website in coordination with the ‘Stupid People Smack’ site, one with a charter to throttle people who have triggered the ‘SPS’ site three times. So, if you cause ‘SPS’ to hit you 3 times, the 4th time ‘Throttle’ will reach out from the screen and kill you. Thus reducing the number of stupid people in our human gene pool and possibly saving us from anymore really ugly websites with pop-ups and bad music and clashing screaming colors begging to be put out of their misery.
Fucker everything up might be my new expression.
Nat,
It’s not looking good for them at the moment. One little kid had the fucking gall to tell me I “had” to set up AIM messenger just for him. Um, no, little bastard, but I will invite you to my backyard so I can proceed to teach you some fucking respect.
Leon,
I’m getting my degree so I can start my own company and be the boss. I’m not a “such is the case” kind of chick. I’m all about the power.
sydwynd,
OMG!! I’m soo in. Oh yes. I’ll make it my mission in life to develop that program too. We’ll be the most awesomest idiot smackers in the whole WORLD! Mwahahaha!!!
Um, ok then.
Miz UV,
Right now it’s sucking for me because they’re like “Well, duh duh blah blah” and I’m like “Well we can do this and here’s a demo of the graphic for that and I’M THE BOMB-DIGGITY, YOU FOOLS!!!” And then they pretend they didn’t notice what I wrote and go a whole other direction. I guess I’ll let them do all the work. Why not? I’ll get credit for signing on the stupid forum and posting ideas that go nowhere. And then I’ll be done. And life will be good again.
Karen,
We could make it throttle on the first wrong answer and then laugh hysterically. Why waste time giving them chances? Might as well thin the herd from the get.
Stan,
Feel free to help yourself. I’m all about spreading the love like that.
Hey, what did you say about black backgrounds, huh? HUH?!
Anyways, maybe they’ll be extra creative and do a rainbow gradient background with neon GREEN lettering in 6pt script type and lots and lots of animated gifs. Ohhhhhh, and if you are REALLY lucky, perhaps they will throw in a crappy looking flash intro that takes all day to load. Whoo hoo!
Agh, groups. I don’t like working in groups unless I’m working with my friends. Otherwise, we all just kind of stare at each other waiting for someone else to throw out ideas.
And be careful about letting them know you know how to do anything. If they know you know how to do something, then they’ll make you do EVERYTHING.