I Got a Present!

Monique was a darling and convinced me to give her my actual home address. At first I was leery and then decided why not? So I did. Guess what? She sent me goodies!!

Behold:

There’s a smiley magnet (I seriously love the smilies), a little Texas magnet complete with a gun that reads “We don’t dial 911″ and a Bullshit bag. What’s it say on the bag, you ask?

Disposable
Bullshit Bag
Seals BS IN
>DIRECTIONS:

1. OPEN BAG BEFORE OPENING MOUTH
2. TUCK OPEN BAG BENEATH CHIN
3. START “TALKING”, LET THE B.S. FLOW
4. WHEN FULL, SEAL BAD AND DISPOSE OF.

Warning:

Do not attempt to dispose of your BS through any government agency since they produce more bullshit than they can dispose of themselves. We suggest that you send it to the major networks in return for all they send out each day.

So a big Ohio “Thankee” to Monique for the most awesome of Texas goodies. But, um, can you please send me the ammo for that gun? I’ve got some beetles to take care of.

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