I have been so incredibly busy for the past week and however long that I’m getting nothing on this blog done. And that’s a good thing. It’s not all school work right now. A friend of mine actually invited me to join him on a project and I’m working on that too1. This is so awesome2 I can’t even tell you just how awesome it is3. I’m taking a break right now because my brain is getting clogged with trying to get the margins just right.
So, I’m working on this project and looking around at some different tech sites for various tools4. I love reading web tech information. I love how tutorials are generally written and I love how straight forward the folks who comment are. Most of what I’ve seen has been written by men, which it typical because most coders (I’ve noticed in my wanderings) seem to be male. That’s fine with me. I knew that my chosen field was pretty male dominated when I decided to get into it.
I do notice, though, that most of the tech males5 that I encounter seem to take me a lot less seriously because I’m female. If I pretend to be a male online I seem to get a lot more respect from community members. Not so much if they know I’m not carrying my reproductive organs on the outside of my body. I was slightly irritated about that the other day when I had a discussion with my friend. He suggested that perhaps I adopt a masculine pseudonym while working online and, well, I’m seriously considering it. Just because I don’t want to be given the brush off just only because of my gender– and that has happened to me a couple of notable times in the very recent past.
This only became an issue with me on a personal level because I’ve noticed that I’m expected, as a female, to behave a certain way. And if I don’t behave that way then I’m perceived in a negative light. I’m more straight-forward than most people appreciate from a woman and that’s gotten me into problems– to the point that I’ve considered prefacing everything I say with “I’m sorry…” just to get that shit out of the way. Women are expected to be more gentle and “considerate”6 whereas men are supposed to be more direct when dealing with issues. Women aren’t perceived to be able to function well when faced with technical issues because our brains aren’t supposed to process that information. Though my brain does process that information a little differently than my male colleagues7 it does process the information. In fact, my brain loves that information.
I love to solve puzzles. I imagine that most people who get into coding or research or math or forensics feel the same way. They see a problem and want to find a way to fix it. Actually, I guess I could go further than the more “intellectual” areas and say that carpenters, plumbers, mechanics and others of that stripe love to solve puzzles– for the same reason I’ve already mentioned. We are at point A and need to be at point C, so how do we get there? The areas that I’ve mentioned are male dominated, but they aren’t populated solely by males. Females too find a field in which they can solve a puzzle– or many puzzles– on a regular basis because we love it and our brains thrive on the challenges.
But our efforts aren’t taken as seriously as the efforts of our male counterparts. Because of the stereotypes. And it goes beyond the work force. Socially we’re expected to behave differently8. I’ve learned to deal with that a bit better. I’m not very big on sugar coating things. I don’t know if that’s a personality defect as some have said9 but that’s the way I am. I say what I mean without the bullshit– sometimes to my detriment but sometimes because the bullshit needs to be end10. This is me– take it or leave it. It’s not so easy to say that in a professional setting.
I’m excited about this new opportunity. I’m really passionate about what I’m doing. Considering what’s gone on in my life the last year and some odd months, I’ve been really blessed to come onto a project like this. It just really pisses me off that I’m actually considering a masculine pseudonym so that my abilities will be taken more seriously. It pisses me off because this shouldn’t even be a consideration. The reality, though, is that I might have to do that so that what needs to be done will be done without me having to prove myself every single time. What a load of shit that is.
It’s also steeled my resolve to not be that stereotypical woman and to be exactly who I am. To all those whose feelings will inevitably be hurt because I don’t behave as you believe a woman should behave, I apologize preemptively.
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Sphere: Related Content- It’s doubling as a school project and yes, he knows that. [↩]
- I’m going to use it in my portfolio, of course. [↩]
- Especially after everything that happened just prior to that invitation. [↩]
- Exactly what I’m looking for and what I’m talking about isn’t important. [↩]
- Not all of them are men, by the way. [↩]
- Intentional use of quotes there. [↩]
- Can I use that word yet? [↩]
- And men, of course, are supposed to be grunting, out-of-control, meat-eating Neanderthals. [↩]
- Or a disability as some others have said. [↩]
- I think I’ve gotten even more direct and less tolerant of crap since I’ve been online, but mostly it’s because I’m too old for it [↩]







So…
I’m almost done with my new project (done in partnership with two other people, by the way) and am pretty proud of what I’ve accomplished so far. I’m learning way more this way that I have been in class. That is, actually, more than a little irritating considering the amount of money George Soros/Rahm Emmanuel pay for my tuition, but what are you going to do?
My favorite part of the project is learning jQuery. I actually dismissed that previously (figuring I’d learn about it in school…ha!) but then needed something from it and now I’m in love. Like I said on my FB, I love any kind of code I can get to run properly.
Anyway, my initial thought was to run the site on WordPress. I know WordPress and can make it do pretty much anything with a good plugin. Right? But that went out the window. I need to learn this stuff. So I built a static site– from the ground to almost up1. We may decide later to change it into a php based site or use a CMS2, but that will be when the site becomes too big to manage properly with just notepad and Filezilla.
First I put my Photoshop skills to the test. After two rejections of the initial mockup I was able to move on to the CSS/xHTML. Figuring out the layout was fun and challenging, but I learned some stuff and got it rolling (pretty much). The bells and whistles are being provided by jQuery because it pretty much rocks my socks right now. I was even able to build a basic PHP contact form with validation3.
Now, I know you’re thinking “What took so long?” and “What do you mean ‘learning’? Can’t you just copy and paste?” I’m learning by understanding how the code that I’m using works. I can do up a WP site because I understand how WordPress works (mostly). But what about without WP to run things behind the scenes? I want to be able to do this stuff without the help of other people (at some point) and, possibly, share what I’m learning with other people. That requires looking at what’s going on, tearing it apart, breaking it and then fixing it. And that gets my full attention. It’s a really fulfilling process. I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about this problem and that and then finding solutions. I love it.
I’ve also got a paying client lined up. I’ll be doing for him what I’ve done on this project– but faster and with better results. Now that I’ve refreshed my skills in areas I already knew and learned some new stuff I should be able to pound something out in a couple of weeks4. Then, hopefully, he’ll send someone else my way5. I’m really excited about that, of course. Right now my portfolio is woefully lacking.
The bad news is that my husband’s irritated with me because I spend so much time working on this project (which is technically paid right now). He doesn’t understand the non-tangible benefits of what I’m doing. I’m not overly bothered about his irritation, but I’ve got to learn to pace myself better and not let my code OCD get the best of me. I get way too involved in what I’m doing and pretty soon my “I’ll be done in 10 minutes” turns into 2 hours later. Oops. I’ve got $10 that says he’ll feel much better about my endeavors once I start getting paid, though.
I’m having a lot of fun and learning a lot of stuff, so it’s all good for me. I’m also practicing not using foul language.
6. I can’t wait until my new “career” starts bringing in real money so I can quit waiting tables. Until then I’m going to keep practicing and learning– and being boring.
P.S.
I just realized that when you’re using the .htaccess to change file extensions that it’s a good idea to include all file extensions in the equation. If you don’t do that and use a php file to handle email coming from an html contact form your email will be broken. Just an FYI. And, yes, I fixed it.
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